My mother is dying and I’m trying to stay strong. February 15. 2018   Leave a comment


Carol Lewis pic by Tim Lewis


Is it Friday yet? I kind of hope not.

Four Friday’s ago I went up to the ER because they brought my mom in due to a very painful headache. Her cancer returned this fall and she went through radiation in November and early December. I thought that by four Fridays ago she’d be healing. They checked her out and did a scan that didn’t show anything bad. They guessed that it might be a reaction to coming off the pain meds she had been using. I drove her home.

Three Fridays ago I was on lunch break when my supervisor said they took your mom to the ER. I headed up and met her there. She had been reaching up into a cupboard for something, felt faint, then almost passed out and fell into a chair. She has had a blood clot for a while, likely brought on by one of the cancerous nodes pressing on a vessel. They though it was just that motion that blocked the blood flow, and the blood thinners would lessen the blockage soon. I drove her home.

Two Fridays ago we had an appointment to check in with the radiation oncologist at the hospital. No need to go to the ER at all. She had a PET scan earlier in the week and we would see the results of the radiation therapy. That oncologist sat down with Ken and I and explained that the treated area showed improvement but the cancer had spread to a mass behind her eye, a spot in the back of her head, spots in her lungs and in her clavicle. We spoke to the chemo oncologist and he was ready to help her get a bit stronger and start immunotherapy. She was feeling weak and wanted to be admitted to the hospital. I didn’t drive her home that night.

Last Friday Mom, Ken, and I met with the oncologists and palliative care nurses and doctors to discuss the best plan going forward. Mom had gone through too much pain and was too weak and decided that going through rehab would be too much. She would move to Respite House where they could make her comfortable. She was moved over into a lovely room on Saturday. The staff have been inundated by the staggering amount of visitors. She has touched a lot of lives. Ex-Governors and movie stars would be jealous of the amount of love she is receiving. I visited her on Saturday and Sunday and Monday and Tuesday but not Wednesday. Ken visited her that day. I saw her today and she is alert and my Mom.

I will spend as many moments with her as I can, but I’m beginning to hate Fridays.




Posted February 16, 2018 by tmusicfan in Uncategorized

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